Birthday Celebration

Last Thursday, we celebrated TK's first birthday!

We didn't want to do a huge party, but we also don't have much in the way of local family. His birthday happened to fall on the night our community group comes over anyway, so we just had an evening of fellowship with our church family and celebrated Tiernan's first year together.

I made him a carrot cake with cream cheese icing. He loves dogs, so I made it into a little white Scottie.

Opening presents! He was fascinated by all of them, it was hard to get him to move on to the next.

But he definitely thought they were exciting.

The aftermath.

He blew out his own candle! Actually, he did it so fast that I had to relight it to take the picture.

In retrospect, I kind of wished that we had been able to let him go at his own pace and do things as he was ready. When we tried to do the cake, he was getting tired and really just wanted to play with his awesome new toys, so he wasn't all that interested. I felt like he'd missed out on the time-honored tradition of the first year cake demolition, so we celebrated 'A Year and a Day' on Friday with just us, and let him take his time, when I could focus completely on him and not get wrapped up in the role as hostess of the festivities.

The cake did not fare as well on its second encounter.

Happy first year to my Little Man!

Randomness

So, it's not always easy to find time to blog. There just seems to be so many other more important things to do, like play peekaboo with Tiernan. It doesn't help that I finally decided--as though I didn't have enough current hobbies at the moment--to try to write the story that has been kicking around in my head for the past couple months. It's a fantasy/fiction piece that will probably end up being something longer than a short story but perhaps not a full 500 page novel. Although if it goes the way of most of my stories, it will end up as a partially finished piece on the computer. But maybe not. Either way, I enjoy the writing process, so all is not lost. However, it does mean that most of the time I have to spend on the computer I want to be working on it, so blog posts may not appear as frequently. Unless I post what I wrote on the blog...hmm.

This morning I took Tiernan to Dr. Prochnow for his 12 month check-up, and he confirmed once again that my Little Man is a strong, healthy, growing boy. For those who care, he was 22 lbs, 30 inches, placing him in the 50th percentile for weight and 70th for height. The doc was impressed by his motor and social skills...no surprise there.

I'll close with a random pic from last weekend when we went to the Dallas Museum of Nature and Science. Tiernan had a blast exploring...and meeting the grizzly bear.

To Tiernan

Happy first birthday, my dear Little Man.

Those first few months after I married your daddy, I thought life was the very best it was ever going to be. I was happy beyond my dreams. And then you came, and you brought us so much joy and love that somehow, life was even more beautiful. I don’t know about you, but I think I can say this has been the best year of my entire life.

You’re an amazing kid. You love to explore, discover, and push yourself to the limit, and I love to watch you do so. You’re bursting with a contagious energy and joy, and it has blessed me. You brighten up the day of everybody you come in contact with--I can see it as we meander through the grocery store or walk down the street. You always have a grin for everyone we meet, and I know that you’ve made that moment happy for them by the way their faces change to reflect your joy.

I cherish each day I spend with you. You’re growing up so fast, I don’t want to miss a moment. Even now, at one year, you don’t fall asleep on your own, nor do you sleep through the night. I spend probably one to three hours every day getting you to sleep, and I absolutely love it. Those are hours every day that we get to snuggle, nurse, sing, whisper, and dance together. There have been many days that all you wanted was to be held close. And so we did, and you would silently cling to me while we did dishes, made dinner, and tidied the house together. Other days you would be happy playing on the floor, but you almost always wanted to be near me, and I you. So you would sit by my feet and pull all the baking pans and pots out of the cabinet while I chopped vegetables. As you’ve gotten older, you’ve found all sorts of fun mischief to get into--like spraying me with the hose while I was practicing my yoga--and your delighted squeals always melt my heart and make me laugh along.

I am so privileged to be your mommy. Grow strong in God, Little Man. I love you more than you will ever know.

Mom

The Balancing Act of Motherhood

I've been thinking a lot the past few days on motherhood, how various women respond to the role, and what my response is. 

There seems a prevalent tendency in our society for children to be relegated to the back burner of the parent's lives. They are inconvenient draining burdens. Even within the church, as often as people say "children are a blessing", only some live as though they truly believe it.

I am so blessed to be Tiernan's mom. It's not always easy, but he really has blessed us beyond my dreams. I do not want to miss a moment. Yes, there's a lot to do. It's way too easy to get caught up in getting stuff done, whether that is personal interests or careers, or just being a model housekeeper. But I want to do things with him, to watch him grow and learn and discover the world. I have heard far too many parents attest that their child-rearing years passed far too quickly to not believe that it is going to be over before I know it. Twenty years sounds like a lifetime to me, but it's going to pass before I'm ready.

On the day that Tiernan gets in the car and drives away to college or whatever God has for him, I do not want to look back and regret that I did not take the time to enjoy every stage and season I shared with him. I don't want to wonder, "What did I do with my time?" I want to be able to look back on the years and cherish the memories.

Yet at the same time, there is another extreme that I want to avoid. It's the mothers who become so wrapped up in their children that they themselves cease to exist for any other purpose. They become overprotective, clingy, and have trouble letting go once their children mature into adults.

On that day when our youngest child leaves the house and we are officially empty-nesters, I do not want to look in the mirror and realize I have forgotten who I am without my children. I do not want to look across at Robert and wonder who he is or what we are doing together.

I am a mother, and it is a large part of my identity for this season. But it cannot become my sole identity, for it is only a season. That is why I try to take time to nourish our marriage; to work on hobbies like woodworking, art, or music; to be myself without constraint. My role is to actively, presently, and joyously raise my children up and send them out; not to ignore, not to hoard. There is a balance to attain.

Adventure 8.10 :: Enchanted Rock

Some of you may remember my post about wanting to go on road trips. I'm here to announce that we have begun making fantastic memories together.

We had a few obstacles to overcome. First of all, it was August in Texas, which meant that going out to the desert could easily lead to a miserable time at best or heat stroke at worst. Second, it seemed wiser to go somewhere a little closer for our first attempt, just in case it went horribly wrong at some point.

To solve the heat issue, we planned a modified version in which we left Austin at 4:00 PM on Friday, as soon as Robert got off work. By the time we arrived at 6:15, it had begun to cool off and the UV index was not "scorch you to a crisp in five minutes flat". We spent the night, and left as the heat began to pick up, thereby avoiding being out in the hottest part of the day.

We picked Enchanted Rock State Park for our destination. I went there last year in February with my family when I was 3 months pregnant with Tiernan, but Robert had not been able to join us. 

We hit some traffic leaving Austin, but Tiernan slept for most of the drive, so it worked out really well.

When we got there, we did some exploring behind the campground and climbed up the smaller sister dome. We played a bit of music, climbed around, and enjoyed the setting.

Tiernan had a blast figuring out how to deal with uneven surfaces. He usually tried walking up them first, but if they were too steep he would resort to crawling. He tried sliding down on his bottom, but found running down much more exhilarating. Needless to say, he needed to be watched pretty closely.

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I already posted this one on Facebook, but not everybody checks fb and it's too good to miss. There was a huge flock of vultures circling the top of the dome, and he thought they were pretty exciting.

I call this picture "The Little Explorer", and it's another one of my favorites. I think he looks like the esoteric pictures of the trailblazer standing on a peak, gazing off into the distance with triumphant music playing in the background...

From there, we watched the sun set together.

The original plan had been to sleep in the car, but we found this awesome campsite right at the base of the rock and decided to sleep there instead.

So we plopped our foam pads there on the ground and slept under the stars. It was truly amazing. The stars were fabulous...way better than Missouri ever saw, what with its humidity. The only other time we'd seen so many stars was way out in the Mexican desert south of Juarez. We also caught the tail end of the Perseid meteor shower. The only drawback were that the mosquitoes were very annoying. There weren't that many--not swarms or anything--but the ones that were there were persistent. Every time I would start to drift off to sleep, one would start whining in my ear or prick me somewhere. After a couple hours of that we prayed for wind to come and blow them away, and sure enough, a steady breeze picked up and we slept peacefully until dawn. Sure, Robert looks like he has measles now from all the bites, but we don't regret it a bit.

After breakfast we hiked the dome while it was still relatively cool. I carried Tiernan in the Moby wrap, and Robert carried all our supplies. It was actually significantly easier to climb with a 20+ lb toddler strapped on than it was with a peanut-sized baby in utero. We took one break on the trek up. We weren't watching clocks, but I think it took us about 20-30 minutes to mosey our way up.

Once you get about half way up, the wind blowing up the rock feels awesome. Here we are enjoying the breeze.

The view is amazing from the top. It is windy, wild and free. Robert took care of Tiernan for a bit while I got away to listen to the area and write some music. We hung out, enjoyed the view, and then headed back down to camp. Tiernan fell asleep in the Moby on the trek back, and took a decent morning nap. Back at camp, we recorded a rough take of the inspiration for a song I got while up on the rock.

It was starting to get warm at that point, so we packed up and headed back to Austin. We stopped in Fredricksburg on the way, walked up and down Main St, and ate some rather delicious homemade peach ice-cream from one of the orchard stands. We got home by 2:30, in time to clean up, nap, unpack, relax and enjoy the remainder of our weekend.

A couple things I learned for next time:

1) We don't need that much food. I think we ate approximately 1/3 of what I brought. So next time I will either have to bring a small army to eat what I prepared, or bring less.

2) Cheap Walmart gear is, well, cheap. While I'm sure Coleman thought it was genius to make a 5-gallon water cooler with a removable dishwasher safe spout, I think I would have preferred one that did not leak a steady stream. They should probably stick to stoves.

3) Take bug spray, a tent, or both.

Letter to a Stranger

Dear Random People in the Grocery Store,

I realize this might be news to you, but I would like you to know that most babies are not, in fact, cross-dressers. Therefore, if you see a child in brown leather shoes with puppy dogs on them and a green and brown striped romper with a monkey and 'Surfer Dude' embroidered on the front, he is probably a dude. Not a girl. If you're not sure, feel free to ask. Asking is better than getting it wrong. I do appreciate the kind comments, but please use the correct pronouns.

Sincerely,

A Mother

A Typical Day Recorded in An Untypical Way

Here is a photo journal of a usual weekday at the Szalapski household. Friday, August 6th, to be exact.

The plan was to sleep in, as we'd been having to get up early every day this week to get Robert to a conference NI was putting on. Unlike two certain other males that I live with, I am equipped with a body clock, so I woke up at the same time we had all week. 6:30, to be exact. I tried going back to sleep, but gave up. I was hoping the clocks would show in the picture, but they didn't. They said 6:50.

Tiernan wasn't long in joining me, though.

We began with the Very Important Cup of Tea. Lyons is my favorite--it's an Irish company, and while it claims to be the most popular over there, I've only found one store in Austin that sells it.

Ever since Amanda blogged about it, I'd been thinking about trying the oil-cleansing method on my face. I finally got started about a month ago, and I've really liked it. I've never been good about washing my face, but I enjoy doing the cleansing...it's very relaxing.

Tiernan got to play in the tub once I needed the sink for the hot water.

While we waited for Daddy to wake up, we packed his lunch, nursed, and read books. Tiernan especially likes books with dogs in them that he can bark at.

Once Daddy woke up, Tiernan and I made breakfast while he showered. Scrambled eggs with roasted potatoes and toast, to be exact.

Tiernan wasn't impressed. He's not much of a breakfast person yet.

He did enjoy feeding Robert, though.

His latest trick has been blowing out candles. We're practicing for his birthday. He knows not to touch them, and so far has done pretty well at obeying.

Then we said goodbye to Daddy as he left for work.

After Robert leaves, we always go play outside on the back deck for an hour or so. I read, have my quiet time, journal, and drink my tea. Tiernan adores being outside, but with the heat what it is we limit it to a couple hours in the mornings and evenings.

Then we went to the front so I could do some woodwork. Robert spoils me, he really does. Sanding goes so much faster with a power tool. Tiernan wasn't thrilled with the noise of it, though, so I had to finish after he went down for his nap.

While he was sleeping, I continued working on wood. After I finished sanding, I began doing the burning. I wish I'd remembered to take a picture of the finished product, but I didn't, and I already gave it away.

When Tiernan woke up, we had a snack of hummus and bread, a favorite of ours.

We read books, played,

and washed dishes and cleaned the kitchen.

We ate our lunch of leftovers.

Tiernan fed himself cheese on a fork. I did the stabbing.

We did a bit more housework and playing. Or playing housework, to be more accurate, since I don't think much got done.

Meet Tiernan the thrill-seeker. He did this quite intentionally a couple times.

Next we made bread.

While the bread was rising, we worked on music together. I was working on writing some harmony and counterpoint to a song we're getting ready to record.

Tiernan got tired and fell asleep while I played.

Then our friends came over to play! Here is Karyn Kalmbach, Tiernan, and Mia in the kitchen.

I really, really wish this picture hadn't turned out so blurry! But it was too good to not post.

Then Daddy came home and Tiernan and the bear tackled him.

We all worked on music together.

Robert watched Tiernan while I fixed supper, and then we ate. (Italian beef and gravy, bread, peas, and salad.) Sorry for the cheesy grin.

Then Robert and Tiernan played with the hose outside while I did the dishes and cleaned up after supper.

I was pretty tired by the end of the day, and well, Robert spoiled me some more. It started with a foot massage while I nursed Tiernan, and then escalated to a bubble bath (complete with candles, dark chocolate, and Irish Cream) and a full body massage. By the end of it I was thoroughly relaxed, and enjoyed a wonderful night's sleep.