TK is still not sleeping well, although it seems to be for different though still unknown reasons. He no longer wants to nurse all night, but now he doesn't want to sleep in his bed. I want to say I'm fine and confident that we're making all the right decisions and that things will be fine, but I'm not. I'm indecisive and wondering if I've been doing it wrong all along and what on earth I should do now. There are so many different schools of thought, and I'm not sure which is right for us at this stage. And while several tell you it's not your fault that your baby wakes up frequently, there are a few that have this attitude of "Well, if you'd listened to us, he wouldn't have sleep problems..." and it feels kinda snooty. That's what I don't like. Snootiness. I'm sure your method worked great for you and your babies, but you don't know anything about me and mine, so stop pretending you have a magic cure-all. Okay, now I'm rambling. Probably comes from not sleeping enough.
I love Tiernan. Deeply, strongly, fiercely. So much so, that as I think about the possibility of having future kids, questions burn in my mind: how could I possibly love another child the way I love Tiernan? I know favoritism is wrong, but could I avoid it? Is there room in my heart for another child?
There is no such thing as a magic cure all. Some methods work great on one kid not on another. Some methods you as a parent can stomache, and some go out against your comfort zone, and so regardless of it might work, it just doesn't seem like the right answer for you. And what does the word 'works' even mean? Some kids naturally need more or less sleep, if you got the latter, than no method is going to change that.
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone!, in that I think sleep is probably the number one challenge for parents of young children. 2nd in line is probably eating. And sure, some kids do both with ease, but there WILL be other areas they are challenged with, that Tiernan will glide through with ease. From watching him I can see he has many strengths, this is just an area that needs some work, and you will figure it out.
Roland wakes up at the crack of dawn, always has, and I would guess always will. But I always joke to myself that while others are snoozing, he is already started his learning for the day, and those extra hours might benefit him more than another hour of sleep. And now I hit the trails at 7am walking every day. I changed my perspective of the situation, and turned it into good.
He is not even 1. You will get to a better night sleep soon, as he ages.
have you spoke with his pediatrician?
ReplyDeleteYou're doing fine!! Don't let anyone tell you different. Kids are NOT the same - they are all very different. You will find what works for your family - but it's definitely a learning curve.
ReplyDeleteAnd, as for having more children - I felt the same way! How could I love anyone more than my Hayden? And then Corbin came along and my heart grew.